By Chloe Beaufoy
The phrase “women support women” is often invoked as a rallying cry for solidarity, empowerment, and mutual upliftment. We hear it in boardrooms, on social media, and at local meet-ups. But when we scratch the surface, the reality is far more complex, filled with heartwarming instances of genuine care, yet also marred by cliquey behaviors, hidden rivalries, and a competitive undercurrent that often leaves many feeling isolated. In this article, we’ll explore true-life scenarios where women have supported each other in times of need and contrast them with moments when support was conditional or altogether absent. Ultimately, I’ll share my own stance: while there are shining examples of sisterhood, too often the support seems restricted to exclusive cliques, where the unspoken rule is “stay at our level,” a stark contrast to the more unconditional bonds many men form.
Heartwarming Acts of Solidarity
Across the globe, countless instances testify to the beauty of women coming together. Notable examples include:
The Aba Women’s Riot (1929):
In southeastern Nigeria, thousands of Igbo women united against British colonial authorities’ attempts to impose taxes. Their collective action, known as the Aba Women’s Riot or “Ogu Umunwanyi,” led to significant policy changes, showcasing the power of organized female resistance.
New Zealand Women’s Suffrage Movement (1893):
New Zealand became the first self-governing country to grant women the right to vote. This monumental achievement was the result of relentless campaigning by women’s groups, including the Women’s Christian Temperance Union, who gathered nearly 32,000 signatures in support of women’s suffrage.
Campaign Against Female Genital Mutilation in Egypt (1920s):
Egyptian women, alongside the Doctors’ Society, initiated one of the earliest campaigns against FGM, highlighting its negative health effects. This activism laid the groundwork for the eventual ban of the practice in Egypt in 2007.
These examples highlight the profound impact of women supporting each other in pursuit of justice and equality.
When Support Falters: The Impact of Internal Divisions
The Case of Senator Natasha Akpoti-Uduaghan:
In a recent incident highlighting the complexities of female solidarity, Nigerian Senator Natasha Akpoti-Uduaghan accused Senate President Godswill Akpabio of sexual harassment. Following her accusation, the Senate suspended Akpoti-Uduaghan for alleged misconduct unrelated to her claims.
In response, a group known as Women for Good Governance organized protests at the National Assembly, not in support of Akpoti-Uduaghan, but demanding stricter penalties against her. The protesters accused her of attempting to discredit Akpabio and destabilize the legislative body.
Notably, when a protester was asked about the reasons behind her participation, she appeared uninformed about the specifics, indicating a lack of personal understanding regarding the situation.
This scenario shows how internal divisions and lack of informed perspectives can lead to women opposing each other, even in situations where solidarity might be expected.
The Women’s March Movement
The Women’s March, initiated in 2017 as a protest against the inauguration of Donald Trump, showcased both the strengths and vulnerabilities of modern feminist movements. While the initial march marked the largest single-day protest in U.S. history, subsequent years revealed internal fractures. Accusations of racism, antisemitism, and organizational conflicts led to a decline in participation and effectiveness. By 2025, the movement had rebranded as the “People’s March,” aiming for inclusivity but struggling to recapture its original momentum.
The Chicago Women’s Liberation Union (1970s)
The Chicago Women’s Liberation Union (CWLU), active during the 1970s, faced significant internal challenges. Despite its contributions to feminist activism, the organization struggled with factionalism and a lack of cohesive structure. These internal conflicts led to purges and a loss of support, culminating in the dissolution of the union by 1977.
The Women’s Movement in Sudan Post-2019
Following the 2019 revolution in Sudan, the women’s coalition MANSAM encountered internal disagreements, particularly between members aligned with political parties and those from civil society. This discord hindered the coalition’s ability to present a unified front, weakening its effectiveness in advocating for women’s rights.
Reflections on Sisterhood: Navigating the Dualities
These narratives illuminate the dual nature of women’s collective actions. On one hand, unified efforts like the Aba Women’s War exemplify the transformative power of solidarity. On the other, internal divisions, as seen in the Women’s March and other movements, underscore the challenges that can undermine progress.
In reflecting on these dynamics, it becomes evident that while sisterhood has the potential to drive significant change, it requires continuous effort to maintain inclusivity and cohesion. Addressing internal conflicts and ensuring that support extends beyond exclusive cliques are crucial steps toward fostering a more genuine and effective solidarity among women.
The Double-Edged Sword of Competition
Competition among women is an age-old narrative. While healthy rivalry can drive innovation and personal growth, it often morphs into a destructive force when it’s rooted in insecurity and scarcity. Consider the workplace scenario where women are pitted against each other for promotions, recognition, or even social capital. Here, rather than pooling resources and knowledge to achieve common goals, many female professionals find themselves entangled in power struggles that leave little room for genuine support.
One colleague recounted how a once-close friendship soured over minor differences in work approaches. What began as a friendly exchange eventually devolved into a subtle battle of one-upmanship, with each party meticulously undermining the other’s contributions. The outcome? Not only did the relationship disintegrate, but both ended up missing out on collaborative opportunities that could have driven collective success. This isn’t to say that all female competition is inherently toxic; rather, it highlights a prevalent cultural pattern where the fear of being left behind or overshadowed forces many women to view each other as rivals instead of allies.
Contrast this with male camaraderie, which despite its own flaws, often appears less conditional. Many men, even after significant conflicts, manage to set aside personal differences to support each other when a chance to excel arises. There is a certain fluidity in male support systems, perhaps driven by different social conditioning where success is seen as a collective achievement rather than a zero-sum game. This observation is not to claim that one gender is inherently more supportive than the other, but rather to shed light on the differing dynamics that often play out in professional and personal spheres.
My Own Stance on Women Supporting Women
Having witnessed both ends of the spectrum, from profound life-changing support in times of crisis to disheartening instances of internal conflicts, I find myself conflicted about the overarching narrative of “women support women.” While I wholeheartedly celebrate the moments when sisterhood shines through, I cannot ignore the recurring pattern where support is confined to exclusive circles. Too often, it seems that women extend their loyalty and care only within their own cliques, as long as you agree to remain on their level. Outside these boundaries, the same women can be quick to dismiss, criticize, or undermine those who step out of line.
It doesn’t make sense that in settings where everyone is striving towards a common goal such as the workplace, community projects and fighting for or against policies, there is an underlying current of rivalry so intense that it becomes a mission to pull others down. I have observed time and again that, once you leave the comfort of a familiar group, the support dwindles. In many cases, the narrative of “women empowering women” is used as a veneer to cover up a more complex reality, where solidarity is conditional and self-serving.
In stark contrast, I see that many men are willing to support their peers even after falling out. When a man shows potential, he is often given the benefit of the doubt and encouraged to grow regardless of past conflicts. This seemingly unconditional support, even in the face of personal disagreements, appears to be a more effective model for fostering collective success.
Looking Ahead: Fostering Genuine Sisterhood
To cultivate a more inclusive and authentic form of support among women, several measures can be considered:
- Self-Reflection: Recognizing and addressing personal biases and insecurities can help dismantle barriers that hinder unity.
- Celebrating Diverse Successes: Embracing each other’s achievements without perceiving them as threats fosters a culture of mutual empowerment.
- Constructive Mentorship: Implementing mentorship programs that encourage open dialogue and collaboration can strengthen communal bonds.
- Challenging Competitive Narratives: Changing the definition of success as a shared journey rather than a zero-sum game can mitigate destructive competition.
In conclusion, while there are inspiring examples of women coming together to support each other, the broader reality is nuanced, with instances where internal divisions have impeded progress. Embracing an inclusive approach to sisterhood, one that transcends cliques and acknowledges the unique paths of all women can transform the idea of “women support women” into a lived reality. By doing so, we recognize that when one woman rises, it paves the way for others to follow, enriching the collective journey toward equality and empowerment.
